Thursday, January 22, 2009
Sunday, January 18, 2009
This is only a test
Well this is my second weekend with out drinking, which would make it three weeks on Friday. (I don't usually drink during the week...depending on how pathetique my work day goes) Knowing my past I feel it is best to sit back once in a while and lay off, just to make sure that I can. There is also another reason. I am saving money so that I can place an order with liduidsolutions.biz. In imitation of the Trappist monks I will then drink in search of an out of body experience. Speaking of which, remind me to tell you the story about the gnome that was shaking the sidewalk. I wasn't the only one to see/notice this.
But back to "this is only a test" of the emergency broadcast system. For those of you old enough to remember television before cable, do you remember when in the midst of your favorite show the screen would go black and the local station would put up a "Please stand by" graphic. Of course someone would get up and stand next to the t.v. in hopes of their proximity to the television would satisfy the stations need for a stand by.
So my self help book. I see so many in a day that it makes we want to vomit. Mine would be one page, one paragraph. No need to check in to rehab or attend meetings. The answer is quite simple, and for only $15.95 I will email the solution to all you dependency problems.
But back to "this is only a test" of the emergency broadcast system. For those of you old enough to remember television before cable, do you remember when in the midst of your favorite show the screen would go black and the local station would put up a "Please stand by" graphic. Of course someone would get up and stand next to the t.v. in hopes of their proximity to the television would satisfy the stations need for a stand by.
So my self help book. I see so many in a day that it makes we want to vomit. Mine would be one page, one paragraph. No need to check in to rehab or attend meetings. The answer is quite simple, and for only $15.95 I will email the solution to all you dependency problems.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
AN EPIPHANY
So for many years I have been moving around the country, even hoping to get out of the country. People will often ask me what I am running from and in return I would ask them if they had thought about what I might be running to.
So what am I running to? I'll tell you when I run into it. As for what I am running from, death. It appears as tho I have had this thought in the back of my mind. When I settle down, saying this is where I want to live the rest of my life, I am conceding to the fact that I will be dying. Where as if I continually move I at would have the thought of "at least I won't die hear". There by never having to face my mortality.
That now brings me to the planning of my funeral. This idea actually came to me several years ago. You know, when you die others will be planning your funeral the way they see best, not necessarily how you would like it to be.
As I lay in my casket I will be surrounded by ice and beer, barley wines and Belgians. The only bottle opener in the joint will be in my cold, dead hand, irremovable due to rig amortise. As people hang out and commiserate (that is if I haven't become such a hermit to no longer know any one) saying "Do you remember that time Pauly..." or "whatever becomes of great bands like Chumba Wumba?", a loop of WILD HORSES as played by the Stones, Old and In The Way, and The Sundays will play over and over. When a crescendo hits, this you will know by the opening notes of Helter Skelter, every one will smash their bottles and glasses on the floor. After that you can bury me, burn me, or float me down a river. Either way I don't care and won't know.
So what am I running to? I'll tell you when I run into it. As for what I am running from, death. It appears as tho I have had this thought in the back of my mind. When I settle down, saying this is where I want to live the rest of my life, I am conceding to the fact that I will be dying. Where as if I continually move I at would have the thought of "at least I won't die hear". There by never having to face my mortality.
That now brings me to the planning of my funeral. This idea actually came to me several years ago. You know, when you die others will be planning your funeral the way they see best, not necessarily how you would like it to be.
As I lay in my casket I will be surrounded by ice and beer, barley wines and Belgians. The only bottle opener in the joint will be in my cold, dead hand, irremovable due to rig amortise. As people hang out and commiserate (that is if I haven't become such a hermit to no longer know any one) saying "Do you remember that time Pauly..." or "whatever becomes of great bands like Chumba Wumba?", a loop of WILD HORSES as played by the Stones, Old and In The Way, and The Sundays will play over and over. When a crescendo hits, this you will know by the opening notes of Helter Skelter, every one will smash their bottles and glasses on the floor. After that you can bury me, burn me, or float me down a river. Either way I don't care and won't know.
A HORSE IS A HORSE OF COURSE OF COURSE UNLESS...
We all know that YOU CAN LEAD A HORSE TO WATER BUT YOU CAN'T MAKE IT DRINK.
This leads me to ponder, IF YOU DON'T LEAD A HORSE TO WATER WILL IT GO WITHOUT DRINKING? And the snowballing continues. I examine horse society. The rolling thunder of hooves fills my head. I can only hope that they stop to drink. Suddenly there is a calm. They have discovered the reservoir that I hold in case of emergency. It tickles as they lap it up. People stare as I laugh at what seems to be no reason. My guffaw startles the horses and they're up and running again. Oddly enough, 90% of them took off in the same direction. After calming, they return to the same pool. I feel the strays meandering about in the different regions of my mind. They know that they will find the sources that feed that watering hole and be refreshed from a purer, flowing source (If they nose around they may find some left over mushrooms).
Back at the main herd things have changed. Sated, the horses stand about, occasionally returning to drink from the same trough as the others. I notice that they neither whinny or neigh. There is no bucking, just lazing about and sucking it up. But then of course I hear the horse talk. All of them! Was it something in the water? Or possibly it was nothing in the water. Listening more closely I hear nothing but PCCP, pop culture catch phrases. Horse sense? People sense? Non sense? No sense makes sense. Read into this what you will.
As for myself, I eat when I'm hungry and drink when I'm dry. I kick up my hooves when I'm happy, and never, ever knuckle bump. (do you remember when the term knuckle bump meant fighting?)
Got to go. I'm hungry and thirsty. Grazing in the grass is a gas, baby can you dig it. I can dig it, she can dig it, he can dig it. Can you dig it? Can you dig it baby?
This leads me to ponder, IF YOU DON'T LEAD A HORSE TO WATER WILL IT GO WITHOUT DRINKING? And the snowballing continues. I examine horse society. The rolling thunder of hooves fills my head. I can only hope that they stop to drink. Suddenly there is a calm. They have discovered the reservoir that I hold in case of emergency. It tickles as they lap it up. People stare as I laugh at what seems to be no reason. My guffaw startles the horses and they're up and running again. Oddly enough, 90% of them took off in the same direction. After calming, they return to the same pool. I feel the strays meandering about in the different regions of my mind. They know that they will find the sources that feed that watering hole and be refreshed from a purer, flowing source (If they nose around they may find some left over mushrooms).
Back at the main herd things have changed. Sated, the horses stand about, occasionally returning to drink from the same trough as the others. I notice that they neither whinny or neigh. There is no bucking, just lazing about and sucking it up. But then of course I hear the horse talk. All of them! Was it something in the water? Or possibly it was nothing in the water. Listening more closely I hear nothing but PCCP, pop culture catch phrases. Horse sense? People sense? Non sense? No sense makes sense. Read into this what you will.
As for myself, I eat when I'm hungry and drink when I'm dry. I kick up my hooves when I'm happy, and never, ever knuckle bump. (do you remember when the term knuckle bump meant fighting?)
Got to go. I'm hungry and thirsty. Grazing in the grass is a gas, baby can you dig it. I can dig it, she can dig it, he can dig it. Can you dig it? Can you dig it baby?
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Baby Its Cold Outside
I just to a break from my all day Chuckie Cheese dvd and beer marathon to go get something to eat. Yes, it has bacon on it. I left the seclusion and reclusion of my apt and walked up the street for a burger. Oddly enough I went grocery shopping yesterday and returned with nothing but beer. So other than C3PO I had to talk to some one other than Mr Cheese (well, and that other person. you know who you are...don't you?)
So yeah, it is cold outside. Food for thought. There are people living out there. Some by choice, others by chance. I remember when I was living in my Corvair van in So Cal of all places. It was an ice box. There were times I had to bring the little propane tank into my sleeping bag to get it warm enough to ignite. this time of year when you are out shopping a lot of retailers ask you to buy a toy, book. or food item to give to the less fortunate. Good? Its like opinions. Mine? Make you feel guilty. Boost their sales, egos, and public image. It is funny how they report their good deeds. Seems as tho the bit about the left and right hand not knowing is side lined even when THEY claim this to be a christian time of year. I'll leave it up to you. You can feed some ones ego, or buy some one a happy meal and tell youself about it every time your feeling down.
As for the cold, Charlie had it right. Move to the desert. A further south desert.
See you in Death Valley.
So yeah, it is cold outside. Food for thought. There are people living out there. Some by choice, others by chance. I remember when I was living in my Corvair van in So Cal of all places. It was an ice box. There were times I had to bring the little propane tank into my sleeping bag to get it warm enough to ignite. this time of year when you are out shopping a lot of retailers ask you to buy a toy, book. or food item to give to the less fortunate. Good? Its like opinions. Mine? Make you feel guilty. Boost their sales, egos, and public image. It is funny how they report their good deeds. Seems as tho the bit about the left and right hand not knowing is side lined even when THEY claim this to be a christian time of year. I'll leave it up to you. You can feed some ones ego, or buy some one a happy meal and tell youself about it every time your feeling down.
As for the cold, Charlie had it right. Move to the desert. A further south desert.
See you in Death Valley.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
TRIPPIN' WITH BOB
I suppose going to Belgium would be the furthest I went to see Dylan. Key word would. As of now the longest trip was from Flagstaff to Milwaukee. That one was quite simple however. A shuttle down to Phoenix. Flight to Milwaukee. Ride to the show by one of my siblings....reverse procedure.
Even tho many have started out with less certainty (see the post THE DEATH OF A PRINCESS from April of "08) all have had peculiarly successful results. Looking back I am rather amazed. Tho the trips in So. Cal. were short, but still there had to be some kind of faith that not all mankind sucks. I'm not sure how, but I saw Bob a couple times in Costa Mesa at the Pac Amp. Both times I got a ride straight back to Northridge. Then there were all the shows at the Greek theater in L.A.. Getting there was easy. A bus ride down the 101 to Vermont Ave, then a short walk towards Griffith park. Getting home was another story...kind of. 11:00 and hitching a ride in L.A. having to be to work at 5:00 the next a.m. For two years running he did three show runs during the week and I never did miss a day of work.
I did however skip out on one of our monthly company meetings only to walk in with a shirt showing some Viet Nam war soldiers and the quote "I ain't gonna work for Maggies brother no more". The irony here being that it was a family run business. But wait, the twist on that is I did work for the brother some more. In fact for two years, during which I quit once and got fired three times. At the risk of sounding immodest, I must say that I am not a model employee but I can kick some ass when it comes to getting the job done. After all, I am on number 47 (if you count getting fired and rehired. Yes it has happened more than once).
Even tho many have started out with less certainty (see the post THE DEATH OF A PRINCESS from April of "08) all have had peculiarly successful results. Looking back I am rather amazed. Tho the trips in So. Cal. were short, but still there had to be some kind of faith that not all mankind sucks. I'm not sure how, but I saw Bob a couple times in Costa Mesa at the Pac Amp. Both times I got a ride straight back to Northridge. Then there were all the shows at the Greek theater in L.A.. Getting there was easy. A bus ride down the 101 to Vermont Ave, then a short walk towards Griffith park. Getting home was another story...kind of. 11:00 and hitching a ride in L.A. having to be to work at 5:00 the next a.m. For two years running he did three show runs during the week and I never did miss a day of work.
I did however skip out on one of our monthly company meetings only to walk in with a shirt showing some Viet Nam war soldiers and the quote "I ain't gonna work for Maggies brother no more". The irony here being that it was a family run business. But wait, the twist on that is I did work for the brother some more. In fact for two years, during which I quit once and got fired three times. At the risk of sounding immodest, I must say that I am not a model employee but I can kick some ass when it comes to getting the job done. After all, I am on number 47 (if you count getting fired and rehired. Yes it has happened more than once).
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